Feel Good Drag
by NowComesTheNight
Summary: Ichigo couldn't do this anymore. Not when it might tear everyone apart. AU, ByaIchi. Drama/Humor. Full summary inside.


Ichigo knew this was wrong, that what they were doing would eventually rip everyone apart, but he didn't think he could stop. ByaIchi AU, slight lime. Drama/humor

Just a quick story inspired slightly by the Anberlin song 'Feel Good Drag' which is a great song and you should give it a listen. This starts somber then lightens towards the end. Mature to be safe, but there's nothing too graphic! Thank you!

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or the song 'Feel Good Drag.'

XoxoxoX

Lips crashed against his and he was pressed harder against the wall as Ichigo felt guilt rise in his mind. They'd been doing this for almost a year now. He knew it was wrong and every time they fell into bed together Ichigo thought 'this'll be the last time,' but it never was. Quick hands left his shoulders and found the hot, flushed skin beneath his shirt, urgently tugging it off before resuming the exploration of his mouth. However, even as his own hands gripped his lovers long, dark hair, Ichigo's mind was wandering.

Sleeping with his best friend's brother-in-law wasn't exactly good form. It was even worse because the man's wife, Hisana, was such a kind person. Anytime he was over their house with Rukia she would ask him about his family and how things were going in his life or with college, offering both food and advice with a gentle smile. He hated that smile. This entire situation would be so much easier if she would have acted superior or with disdain towards him, because then he could find some kind of justification for his actions and alleviate some of his guilt. As it stood, he was fucking a perfectly kind woman's husband just because he wanted to.

A particularly sharp bite to his collar bone had Ichigo yelping in euphoric surprise as a jolt of pleasure rushed down his spine. Byakuya's devilish hands slid across his skin with burning intent, hooking his fingers into his belt loops and pulling Ichigo forward into the hard body in front of him. The contact felt like fire that lit beneath his skin everywhere those graceful fingers trailed. However, this sinful distraction didn't deter his thoughtful mind.

It wasn't just Hisana's kindness that bothered Ichigo about getting in between their marriage. Once, as Hisana was teasing Ichigo while he was waiting for Rukia, Byakuya came in the kitchen and gave his wife a pointed look. Those soft, light blue eyes twinkled with mischief as she swatted primly at his shoulder with a laugh. The silent communication between the two was so obviously intimate that it made Ichigo's stomach twist with jealousy and guilt. The feeling only worsened when Byakuya smiled ever so slightly and ran a hand through her hair, punctuating the action with a small push that rocked her to the side just enough to make her body sway. It was a gentle and affectionate touch that spoke volumes about the two. Byakuya didn't joke around like that with just anyone.

Secretly, he wanted that with Byakuya. Ichigo wanted to have that intimacy and the mutual understanding that came with years of close contact and so much time spent together. As he and Byakuya made their way further back through the hallway with gentle pushes, teasing nips to their overheated skin, and carelessly discarding clothing, he thought about their own relationship.

They weren't without their own level of intimacy. It was just more subtle. The consistent invites to family parties, masked as being a guest of Rukia, when he normally wouldn't be invited was the most overt action Ichigo noticed. There were the hidden touches when no one was looking. The light brush of Byakuya's fingers against his own, a gentle tug to his hair, or a soft whisper in his ear that left him blushing. Then there was their early morning conversations. Quiet words whispered into skin when they were exhausted but unable to tear themselves apart. These were all ways in which Ichigo knew that whatever it was they had was more then casual sex. It was the only comfort he had in his very uncomfortable, guilt-ridden position- hidden between a married man and his wife.

Ichigo was pushed back onto the bed and all of his thoughts deserted him as Byakuya followed him onto the sheets. He went back to attacking Ichigo's neck and trailed down to his chest, soft gasps falling from his lips as those strong hands wandered down his sides. Byakuya grasped him by his bare hips and hauled Ichigo closer to him with an ease that had him chuckling. The sound died in his throat when he felt Byakuya slowly sweep a hand beneath his thigh and coax his leg a little wider. The touch was soft and gentle; controlling, but not forceful. Ichigo groaned as Byakuya shifted, thrusting against him as his lips sought his out.

"You can stay tonight. Hisana won't be back until late in the morning." He gently whispered the words against Ichigo's lips, chilling him to the bone.

"I can't do this anymore." Ichigo said back suddenly. He hadn't meant to say it aloud, but there it was. The subterfuge was just too much for him to stand anymore . As much as he knew breaking it off was for the best he still felt shattered by it, and he couldn't even look Byakuya in the eye as the man pulled away.

"What?" Ichigo felt Byakuya's questioning gaze on him, and he was forced to make eye contact when he felt a gentle pressure brush against his cheek. Byakuya didn't look angry, only confused and worried. "Ichigo, what are you talking about?"

"I can't keep doing this. Because... Hisana... and..." Byakuya's brow furrowed as Ichigo tried to find the right words. This was so much harder than Ichigo had imagined.

Byakuya pulled back onto his knees, looking even more confused.

"But, Hisana likes you. I thought you liked Hisana."

"That's why I can't keep sneaking around behind her back." Ichigo said, exasperated. He levered his torso up and leaned back on his elbows to look Byakuya in the eye. "It's fine for you, you get everything- the wife and the 'mistress,' but it's not fair to me and especially not fair for Hisana."

"But, this was the agreement."

"Agreement?" Now he was confused.

"I'm gay-" Byakuya started.

"No shit." Ichigo said as he scrubbed a hand across his face, cutting in without realizing it. "Did you just figure that out?" He knew he was being snarky, but Ichigo was seriously beginning to doubt where this was going.

"No. Listen." Byakuya said, sounding a little annoyed. "I'm gay, but my parents were pushing for me to get married. They were threatening to arrange one and Hisana was in a similar position, but she was already in love with someone they didn't approve of. Our families had been close for generations, so Hisana came up with the idea that we could marry each other. That way she could be free to be with her lover and I could be free to pursue my own. We are best friends, have been for our whole lives, but we do not love each other. Not romantically, at least."

Ichigo huffed a little, digesting the information. His heart felt like it was about to burst at the mere thought that there was something to hope for.

"So what's with all the sneaking around?"

"A certain amount of discretion is necessary to keep up pretenses. Though the family is very aware of the nature of mine and Hisana's relationship, and by extension ours-"

"No, that's not what I meant- Wait. What?" What Byakuya said suddenly hit Ichigo like an anvil as he shot up to a seated position. He felt like he might throw up. "Everyone knows about this?" He nearly shouted and gestured wildly between the two of them. Ichigo was absolutely floored by the prospect.

"We are the family's worst kept secret." Byakuya replied succinctly. "Why do you think no one batted an eye when you showed up at the annual Christmas party and again at my birthday?"

Ichigo took a deep, calming breath and pressed the heals of his hands to his eyes. It could not be possible that he was the only person unaware of the fact he technically wasn't cheating with Byakuya.

"Ok. Fine." He said with a shake of his head, though he still wasn't completely 'fine.' Ichigo dropped his hands and looked back at Byakuya. "But what I wanted to ask is why is this the first time you've asked me to come over and stay if Hisana is well aware of what's going on?"

"Would you want to listen to your best friend having sex in the room next to you?" His lover countered with a slight smirk.

"Point taken." Ichigo conceded, and there was a long moment of contemplative silence between the two. "Why didn't you tell me?" Ichigo asked, feeling frustrated.

"I thought you already knew." Byakuya explained simply. "You are very good friends with Rukia, and you never struck me as the kind of man to cheat on or with someone."

That comment made all the anger and frustration drain out of Ichigo. He realized that Byakuya must have quite a high opinion of him if he was banking that much on his nature. Suddenly, he felt ashamed and guilty of himself all over again.

"I'm not." Ichigo said, dropping bonelessly back onto the mattress. "I just can't help myself when it comes to you."

The creases in Byakuya's face smoothed away as he lowered himself back over Ichigo. A tender, half smile quirked at the man's lips as he gently brushed the wild orange hair away from Ichigo's face.

"You have never once disappointed me, Ichigo Kurosaki."

Ichigo felt his chest swell and his stomach clench at the words. Byakuya tilted his head slightly as he kissed him slowly and carefully, with his fingers trailing gently across his jaw and down his neck. Ichigo had never before felt so content, or so cared for.

"Though..." Byakuya began as he and Ichigo parted. "Perhaps I should never again overestimate your intelligence."

A startled laugh broke free at the words paired with the rare, mischievous smirk his lover sported. His fingers dug into black hair as he hooked his legs over Byakuya's hips, pulling him closer in a forceful and controlling manner and relishing the breathy sound Ichigo pulled from Byakuya's throat.

"And perhaps I should teach you to never underestimate me."


End file.
